When I was a youth I heard the story of the cross of Jesus, with all the harrowing details. I had also heard stories of martyrs who had died in the Dark Ages for their faith. My young mind found it hard to distinguish between the suffering Jesus endured on His Cross and the suffering endured by the faithful martyrs. In fact, it seemed that some of the tortures the martyrs endured might have been more painful than Jesus` flogging and crucifixion, and longer in duration as well.
As I became older, I began to appreciate a little more the pain of His sufferings in that I could sence the shame and loneliness He had to endure. His disciples and friends all forsook Him and fled, whereas most of the martyrs had at least someone to cheer them in their last hours. But still I found it difficult to see how Christ`s sufferings were more severe than those of some people I could imagine who suffered both excruciating physical torture and the loneliness of rejection.
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Growing up as the oldest of nine children has its share of challenges. I can remember my parents insisting that I should be patient and to always give way to the wishes of the younger ones. These things I tried to do as best as I could but I find myself asking Jesus in my prayers before I went to bed that night to forgive me for failing so miserably. I also remember the many do's and don'ts that seemed endless and overwhelming.
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